Fuck Everything About Stanford

I've been asleep at the wheel since all of those celebrity nudes came out, but the annual dove hunt was a success.  My apologies.  This morning I saw a reference to ex-Stanford captain Ben Gardner's tweets from last week.  I really love it when hypocritical dumbfucks like Ben Gardner decide to throw stones from his very own glass house.  Not to mention his glass shoulder, I hope this pussy enjoys the IR this season.  Honestly, these tweets are fucking laughable.  Watch both Stanford captains (... embarrassing for that program) Ben Gardner & Shane Skov fake injuries against Sark last year, only to come back in the game the very next play. 

I don't understand why Gardner would bring up his own history of lying and cheating in order to jab USC, but I appreciate being given the forum to show just how fucked the entire Stanford program has become.  Whether it's captains clearly taking dives or clock operators cheating USC out of the 2010 game, maybe Ben Gardner should try to grasp the meaning of the pot calling the kettle black.  At least our improprieties were OFF the field.  Stanford tries to have a Notre Dame-esque holier than thou attitude, but Shaw is dirtier than anyone in the Pac-12 now that Tosh Lupoi is gone.  The only reason people don't call him on it is the same reason no one calls Obama on all of his bullshit - he's black.  In keeping with this same theme here, Stanford was allowed to stack the selection committee with Tyrone Willingham & Condoleezza Rice, who would be above reproach if only she wasn't Republican.  Race overpowers everything except conservatism, remember that. 

Andrew Luck's fucking voice and neck-beard make him a cross between Andre the Giant and Goat Boy.  More people hate Richard Sherman than those who don't.  The 49ers front office hates Jim Harbaugh so much that they almost fucking traded the coach that got them to 3 straight NFC Championship games.  Can you imagine how fucking unbearable he must be?  Jonathan Martin... Nevermind, that's too fucking easy.  Each and every asshole that comes out of Stanford is the exact same - they're the smartest person in the room, just ask 'em.  They call Stanford "The Farm" because all of the women look like horses, pigs, and cows.  I'd love to know the percentage of Stanford nerds that actually marry a Stanford chick.  I guarantee it's low as fuck. 

Fuck Stanford.  I'm taking the USC moneyline.