President Bush's First Pitch at Yankee Stadium After 9/11

I was busy with a wedding over the weekend, and I meant to post this video on Friday.  There is a long and a short version below.  It gets a little dusty in the room during the long 30 for 30, so some may rather watch the shorter version.  And I bet you never think of Derek Jeter the same way.

As if you needed verification of just how clutch that first pitch was, here is a chart of notable first pitches.  W barely edged out Slick Willy - with Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor's pitch surprising us all.  Also, 50 Cent far left still makes me laugh.

Glasses That Cure Colorblindness

Immediately when I saw this video, I emailed it to my uncle and a buddy from college who are colorblind.  I still haven't heard anything back from them, but I hope they have a similar experience as the guy in this video.  It's almost spiritual - watching someone see a sunset for the first time.  So if you know anyone who is colorblind, maybe tell them about these Enchroma glasses. 

Texas State Barbie Car Vs. @Vodka_samm Vs. Ole Miss Hotty Toddy - Who Ya Got?

Inside Edition's clip with Tara Monroe, a Texas State junior, is flat out hilarious.  The headshot smile for her mugshot, calling herself a diva who hates to sweat, and her Dad at the end of his robe.  "I'm not at all making a joke of my DUI."  Um yeah, Tara, you are.  And I'm 95% sure she's wearing a Kappa Kappa Gamma shirt, so my sisters are definitely beaming with pride.  I'm not sold on the Tevas though Tara.  Clean that up already.  But in the end, this story got me thinking about my favorite drunk college girl story of recent times.

Vodka Samm comes to mind right away, as she has been a personal hero of mine for literally 2 years now.  Unapologetic about her partying until the day she dies.  I absolutely love everything about @Vodka_samm, and I've never even met her.  But at the same time, I don't want to short change my Hotty Toddy from Ole Miss either.  She insults her own IQ, then takes it back, then admits it's shit after all.  We get a YOLO, choosing Eli Manning's "drive" over his brother Peyton's because of a lack of loyalty, wisdom & advise like "you'll make the grades as long as you get like a 2.0," and her needlessly informing us that she never misses a party.

Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit" 24 Years Old Today

Today is the 24th anniversary of the release of Nirvana's hit single Smells Like Teen Spirit.  I heard a tribute to the song on the radio this morning, and I forgot how much I used to love Nirvana.  Dave Grohl continues to be the ultimate rockstar, after finishing a concert with a broken fucking leg.  That is some Greg Jennings "put the team on my back" type of shit.

College Football Bets - Week 1

There are quite a few interesting matchups this week, including 3 games tonight that are all worth watching.  I can't wait to watch Harbaugh do something weird tonight.  TCU is going to embarrass Minnesota badly.  Just a total boat race.  And I hope the Old Ball Coach's defense is as bad as I suspect.  Good luck and godspeed tonight / this weekend.

Single Plays:
TCU -17
TCU vs Minnesota - Over 58
Utah -6
The Other USC vs. UNC - Over 64
ASU +3.5
Michigan State -17
USC -27
Texas +10
Washington +12

Parlays:
USC -27, TCU -17, Utah -6, ASU +3.5, Mich St. -17
TCU vs. Minn Over 58, the Other USC vs. UNC Over 64, Utah -6, TCU -17

Bring Rotten Bananas Back To Life - Mind Blown

I have neither the correct rice nor a blow dryer, but soon I'm going to ruin a perfectly good banana for the express purpose of bringing it back to life. 

Gender Neutral Pronouns From U of Tennessee Are Absurd

The University of Tennessee's Office for Diversity & Inclusion has issued the above guidelines in order to navigate the new gender-conscious world we live in.  My favorite part of the policy - instead of taking roll on the first day, everyone will be asked to provide their name AND PRONOUN.  Asking a person's title (Mr., Mrs., Miss) is too offensive these days, so you will be asked what gender neutral pronoun you prefer.  They-Them-Their make perfect sense as gender neutral pronouns, almost too much sense, thus it's clearly time to re-invent the wheel in the name of proper tranny tolerance.  For the life of me, I cannot fathom from where Ze-Hir-Hirs, Ze-Zir-Zirs, and Xe-Xem-Xyr are derived.  The etymology of these words must've been conjured out of thin air, if not directly from Bill Maher's brain.  They're just incoherent blatherings and jibberish that no sane person would even begin to comprehend or connect with the pronouns They-Them-Their.  I recently saw LGBT transformed into LGBTQ, since Queers weren't equitably represented in the acronym.  I'm sure the Gay Mafia will end up overtaking the AFL-CIO for world's longest acronym by 2020.

I was at a bar in Tahoe that was "Girls Drink Free," so I simply told the bartender that I identified as a woman.  Seeing that I had him by the balls, pardon the pun, he was fast enough on his feet to claim that only the sex listed on your driver's license was applicable for the drink special.  I'm on a mission to expose all of these ridiculous liberal perversions of the English language, and these gender neutral pronouns genuinely seem like something pulled straight out of The Onion.