Ducks Battle Hawks In Championship

The Ducks clinched in OT last night and will now face the Chicago Blackhawks.  Can you believe we are actually having to duke it out with these racists?  Hockey needs a pro-gambling, anti-freedom of speech commissioner like Adam Silver to punish the NHL's Redskins.  Where is Keith Olbermann's soapbox to denigrate Patrick Kane & Jonathan Toews' owners as they are in the news this week?  And that's another thing - fuck Toews pronouncing his name "Taves."  It's as bad as Favre.

This Joke Will Always Be Funny

President Barack Obama greets Shaq #president #obama #shaq #handshake #whitehouse #basketball #nba #stillgotit #highlighthub

A video posted by HighlightHub Sports (@highlighthub) on May 11, 2015 at 12:05am PDT

If only we could've heard the Obama's opener with the white lady...

Matt Barnes Yelled "Suck My Dick, Bitch" At Harden's Mom

I know you will all be surprised to see the most recent antics of the uber-stereotypical UCLA alum Matt Barnes.  After getting a technical foul for shoving James Harden, Barnes turned to a most likely mouthy Monja Willis and said, "Suck my dick, bitch."  Harden's brother confronted Barnes after the game, and according to TMZ, Barnes pulled "my mom had cancer, I'm sorry" card.  I would expect nothing less from that shitbag.

New War Documentary Series "The Fighting Season" Trailer

DirecTV just ran this commercial during the DP Show for their new documentary series on the war in Afghanistan called The Fighting Season.  Rarely do you get such a good look at combat unless it's some grainy video on Live Leak.  Appointment television in my book.  The 2 hour season premier is on May 19th on the Audience channel.

Shower Thoughts With Anna Kendrick

I remember when I started following the Shower Thoughts on reddit, and I assumed it would end up as some sort of book deal, i.e. Shit My Dad Says, Texts From Last Night, etc.  If I'm being honest, I didn't post the original Nick Offerman Shower Thoughts video (below) because I didn't see the nearly invisible attributions to the authors from Reddit in the bottom left.  Now that I know the attributions are there, my warped brain believes internet justice has been served.  "I wonder what my dog named me" and "If Hillary Clinton wins, it will be the first time two presidents have had sex with one another" are Pulitzer prize worthy ruminations.

Lenny Dykstra & Mitch Williams Roast Each Other

"I didn't steal my son's signing bonus... I didn't rob my mother."

Those are two trump cards you don't normally play back to back.  Philadelphia, the city known for brotherly love and irrational fandom, was chosen as a wise spot for a dual roast of people who absolutely despise each other.  What could go wrong?  Mitch Williams' drunken slur is hilariously strong, like an actor who's laying it on a little too thick.  You would think Lenny Dykstra is drunk or on drugs as well, but he can't while he's on parole.  He just naturally sounds like he's had two strokes.

PS - Please notice the quintessential Eagles fan who drunkenly rushes the stage and tells them to take it outside at 2:25.  People seem so much drunker in Philly.

Steve Carell Creeps Me Out In The Foxcatcher Cocaine Scene

You have to watch this whole video to get the full effect, but for some reason this scene really creeped the shit out of me.  Philatelist is just a disgusting word that sounds like a deviant sex act.  Maybe I'm weird, but Steve Carell made my skin crawl enough times that I really wanted him to get the Oscar.  It felt almost like Hannibal Lecter.  The movie Foxcatcher is super slow, but incredibly well-acted.  This scene inspired me to look up the most iconic cocaine scenes of all time.